Friday, January 7, 2011

"Just Do It" Is a Terrible Advice

Every one of us has been down in one way or another otherwise you are just not normal. It's part of our live cycle; we have to be sad at times and extremely happy flying over the rainbows on some other days. 

When it comes the time that you feel like you are draining down the hill feeling like you want to do absolutely nothing, some people tend to not understand that it is okay for you to stay down for a while. It's like your energy level is zero. Yet, some people will try to push you and advice you to "get it over with", "be strong", "it's not worth it" or "just do it" when you barely want to change your clothes. They do this because they really do care about you and want this sad phase of yours to end now. 

It becomes worse as someone says if X can do it, of course you can. Apparently, it is supposed to motivate you, but on the contrary it reminds you of how helpless you are. Despite the belief that our loved ones have that they know everything going on with us, they don't! As a matter of fact, they may have no idea what is going on because for some reason we don't want to spell it all. 

Instead of just saying "just do it", it would be more helpful unveiling the belief that "nothing can be done". When this belief conquers our senses, we just do nothing because we feel that nothing can be done since our energy levels are so low. For example, it’s January and the weather is very cold; you are all buckled up under the blanket drinking coco. If someone asked you to go buy something from the grocery store, most probably you wouldn't want to go. If, however, you are already outside running an errand or meeting some friends, you will be more likely to welcome the idea to go to the grocery store. The same thing happens with mood swings. 

Therefore, the "just do it" advice wouldn't work with someone in a very low dark sad mood because you are simply asking them to boost their energy from zero to hundred all at once. Baby steps along with baby goals are easier to master and more compelling to accomplish. 

By: Sherwette Mansour

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jaywalker said...

So should we say, "Just _start_ doing it!"?

Sherwette Mansour said...

Yes, that would do it. Also, in a motivating attitude by helping on how he/she can "start" doing it and talking about how "it" can progress to become better while keeping an eye on the goal.

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