Monday, May 7, 2012

Knowing What You Don't Want


Do you know what you want? Or, do you know what you don’t want?

It’s rather very difficult to point out exactly what you want, where you want it and how you want it. Sometimes it doesn’t work out and you are left out to say, “This is not what I want.”

One thing we know is that life is never constant. It is never stable. We will never get to make the same decisions in another time. This is only because of one reason. You can’t withhold your entire situation to be the same at all times. You just can’t.

When we think about that moment and tell ourselves, “If I have to make this decision today, I will do it totally different.” You don’t mean it. You see, you are today a different person than you were yesterday. What you thought you enjoyed yesterday does not necessarily mean it is what you will long for today.

What made you happy yesterday does not necessarily guarantee this happiness today. If you remember the first time you rode the bus, remember how happy you were? To be on your own; taking the bus? What happens if you have to take the bus every single day? It becomes somewhat not fun anymore.

What you wanted when you first wanted to ride the bus totally changed when it became an ugly routine to go to work or to school or to wherever.

It’s very important for all authorities to ask you this question, “What do you want?” For some people, it is very easy to answer but once you get to challenge them a bit and try to hoop in some what-if scenarios, you will start to see a whole other perspective. It’s because what you want depends on constants and what is really constant about life?

When you manipulate the constants, the equation gives you a different answer.

It’s more like a test question. A test question that you either have to answer it right (lucky) or wrong (not so lucky). The thing about answering it right all the time does not give you the taste of being human. We have got to fail to realize other accomplishments and to learn about ourselves.

What if you were always lucky? You will be more likely to take more risks. You will take more risks until one time you get so not so lucky. Your balance shakes. Now, the probability to balance the lucky scale is not working towards you. You see, when you are always lucky and if things go wrong then your lucky credit has loosened. You start questioning everything, which is neither really right nor wrong, but may lead you to take fewer risks. No risks at all maybe? It’s your choice.

We can’t always have the answers to everything and to think we can, dislocates our place in life.

If on the other hand, you were not so lucky, then chances are that you have taken so many risks. You know exactly what you don’t want. You will try to avoid it that next time. Of course, that is if you haven’t discouraged yourself and stuck to the few things you already know.

Imagine for an example, you going to eat your lunch in a restaurant in a foreign place. It has a huge menu and you are very hungry. Some of the meals you know and most of the meals you do not have a clue what are they about. What will you choose to eat?

It’s fairly very easy to get lucky with choosing your lunch if you order any of the few meals that you know. But, what if, what if you choose a meal you have never tasted before? You could like it and become lucky and hate it and become not so lucky.

Exhibit A: If you liked it, you will like the idea of trying new meals. They turn out so tasty after all. You will find it a sweet adventure that is worth pursuing.

Exhibit B: If you don’t like it, you may take one of two roads. Either (Scenario X) choose to stick to what you know next time or (Scenario Y) try new meals; perhaps you will discover a tasty meal you never knew existed? Both scenarios are up to your choice, to your perspective.

What do you want?

It’s quite a tough question. Isn’t it just easier to know what you don’t want?

Back to our restaurant situation, what happens when you go back to that same restaurant?

In Exhibit A, where you liked the exotic meal, will you order it once again? Or would you try yet another meal with new odds of being lucky or not so lucky.

In Exhibit B, where you didn’t like the meal so much, maybe you went to throw up a little in the bathroom afterwards? Will you stick to the meals you know that don’t hurt your tommy (Scenario X)? Or, will you try a new meal with not knowing if you will become lucky or not so lucky (Scenario Y). Only now, you know one new thing. You are not going to order the not so tasty meal you tried before. You know what you don’t want. You just still don’t know what you want. You see?

How many of us have taken Multiple Choice Question (MCQ) exams? We don’t know the answers to all questions. Do we? I mean unless, you have studied very hard. What do you do when you encounter a question you don’t know the answer to? Would you leave it blank? Or, would you give it your “best guess”? How do you give it your “best guess”? I was taught to eliminate the answers I know for sure are not correct. So, here I don’t know the correct answer but sometimes I know some of the incorrect answers. This is how we get to play, and who really knows the answers to life?

It’s knowing what you don’t want that moves you.

So many people out there do things they are not so crazy about. This is not because that’s what they want. It’s because it helps them avoid other things—things that they know they don’t want.

Image Credits to: Stockimages

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